I don’t even know where to begin this post other than with a giant thank you to everyone that read, commented on, emailed, or otherwise supported me after my last post (including those of you who commented on my Facebook page). I wrote that post in about 20 minutes when all those feelings kind of came to a head and I couldn’t hold them in anymore. I almost didn’t publish it, but Chris read it and insisted I did. So thank you to all of you for understanding what I’m going through and all of your advice. I’m hoping to write more about those things in the future, so we’ll see how things go.
For now, I thought I’d do a little life update since it’s been ages since I did that. I primarily started this space to share our lives, so I think I’m a bit overdue for that, so here goes.
- Our weekends have been incredibly busy lately and the rest of the month is no exception. I cannot believe that it’s mid-April already and I know summer will be here in the blink of an eye. I’m excited to be able to have the girls outside more and have the windows open.
- Speaking of windows, we got all new windows in our house this week, along with new sliding doors – and dare I say it’s making a difference in the temperature of our house already. We had to wait two days to put our blinds back up and it turns out we’ll need new ones since our old ones will not longer fit the way they used to. (That’s a cost hiccup I wasn’t expecting, but not much we can do about it.) We’ll have a better idea once we get new ones and we can block the light during the day. Oh homeownership – it’s amazing the things you get excited over, right?
- I gave Ella a tiny taste of food on Saturday (avocado). She kind of played with it but didn’t spit it out… and I’ve been too lazy to try again since. I’m both looking forward to and dreading the baby food phase. With Abbie, we did a combination of both purees and baby-led weaning, which I’m sure we’ll do again. I am probably not making her food this time though – this mama does not have time for that!
- I have a Stitch Fix post I’ve been meaning to share for over a week. I’m hoping to get that up tomorrow. I do have to say, thank goodness for Stitch Fix or I would seriously have no clothes. 90% of my work wardrobe is Stitch Fix.
- My new strategy for getting Ella to be happy and calm on the way home is to douse her in toys. I got her this toy from Amazon that hangs from the seat rest and makes music, and I usually give her about four other toys in her seat to keep her attention. She’s been much better this week (knock on wood) so I’m hoping that trend continues. We’re also going to move her into the convertible seat soon, so that should help as well!
- Abbie is getting to the age that she is starting to require more direction and explanation, and it’s challenging. She’s taken to crying and screaming when she doesn’t get her way We’re doing our best to redirect and explain our decisions, but it’s hard. Four is hard, guys – she can understand but still is working on controlling all her feelings. I know we’ll get there, but it’s incredibly frustrating sometimes.
- We’ve been doing Hello Fresh boxes every week since I went back to work. We’ve really enjoyed them… but they’re getting a little too pointy for Weight Watchers so we’re going to put them on pause for a little while. I’ve grabbed a few new cookbooks so we have some different things to try, and I’m excited to use the grill more as it gets warmer. Way back when I used to publish our meal plans for the week – is that something you would want to see?
- I am really wishing that I did a Passover Seder this year but I just couldn’t handle the thought of cooking the whole meal – and a friend of mine said she had it catered. Genius and I would have never thought of that, so I am hoping to host next year. I think if we do it next year, Abbie will understand a lot more, and she’ll actually understand the story. I really feel that I’m missing my faith in my everyday life, and even if I can’t afford the membership at a temple, I can do what I can at home.
- I have been having the best breakfast bowl before work lately – sweet potatoes, quinoa, black beans, pico de gallo, and two fried eggs topped with queso fresco and avocado. It’s the best and I really should post the recipe. It’s a huge burst of protein the morning and I think it really helps with my milk supply.
- Speaking of my milk supply, it keeps going up and down and I’m learning to just roll with it. Sometimes I have an 18-ounce day, and occasionally I have a 13-ounce day. Stressing about it just makes it worse, so I’m trying to just let it go. I can only do so much and battling with the pump will just make me crazy.
- I’m really trying to make more time to read, and I’m currently reading this book. I’m only a few chapters in, but seriously, where was this book when I went back to work with Abbie? I find myself just nodding my head to everything she’s saying and I’m so glad someone is finally talking about the fifth trimester.
- I’m finally seeing a little bit of a reprieve at work and it’s really helping my mental state. Being overwhelmed all the time just takes everything out of you.
- Sunday marks 10 years since the Virginia Tech shooting and I am not ready for all the emotions that come with that, despite the fact that I was one of the lucky ones.
- Chris took this photo of me and the girls the other morning, and it’s such a testament to our lives right now. I had just finished nursing Ella and Abbie wanted to snuggle. As hard as things can be some days, I’m so thankful for these two girls of mine.
That’s all I’ve got – have a great weekend and enjoy your Easter if you’re celebrating!