I don’t know if it’s been evident, but I’ve been struggling a little bit lately. Maybe struggling is a bit strong of a word, but it seems like there’s just too much going on. Too much to do. Too many thoughts. Too many things I want to do. Too much sleep I’m not getting.
Anyway, it’s been a little hard for me to find the balance lately. There are so many things I want to give my time to, and with working full-time (and commuting nearly 2.5 hours/day), it’s just hard. It’s so hard lately to find time to do all the things I want to do, and one of those things is being active here.
I feel like I’ve just been so absent. I have hopes, plans, and dreams for this little online space of mine, but I’ve really struggled with it lately. I want to be excited, but so many days, I’m just trying to survive. Well, maybe survive isn’t the right word, but the to-do list seems like it just piles up, leaving little time for myself. The time I do have I’m using merely to catch my breath.
I think a lot of people go through this, but it’s truly been hard for me. I’m a person who wants to be able to give everything to everyone. I get my greatest joy by giving. The best presents for me are actually in finding the best presents for everyone else – the perfect card for a friend, surprise concert tickets for my mom, sidewalk chalk as a surprise for Abbie, the jersey Chris wasn’t expecting for Christmas. I work so hard to give to everyone else – because in the end, that’s what makes me happy.
In all that, I often forget myself. I forget to give myself the gift I truly need – time. I always seem to be chasing it, but usually give it away to everyone around me. I never find that balance between time for everyone else and time for myself.
I know I can’t be the only one who struggles with this. I know I’m not alone. So now I’m asking you – where do you find the balance? How do you carve out time for yourself?